[Ebina-san lived in the pond. He kept his promise forever.]
[The evil land shark Ibaraki family plots to turn the pond into a golf course.]
["If You're a Man, Try the Swordfish!"]
Hooked one!
Oh! It's definitely a big one.
You're not getting away.
What's this?
Since the Amanto came, the Earth's ecosystem has gotten so...weird.
Never mind that. Put it in the bucket.
What?! You're going to eat this?!
Of course I am.
Anko's tasty and Natto's tasty, right?
The more grotesque it looks, the better it tastes when you eat it.
Even an ugly a woman always has one or two good points.
Gin-chan, Gin-chan!
I caught a huge one. Look, look!
Ow-ow-ow-ow-ow!
Huh? Maybe it doesn't hurt?
No, it does hurt! Ow-ow-ow!
Say, can we eat it, too?
My dinner!
Forget what you saw just now, okay?
Gin-san, wasn't that a kappa?
[Kappa, A.K.A. water imp, a mythical water creature]
No such thing.
It was just, you know, a regular bald old dude who lives in the pond.
Just the fact that he lives in the pond makes him not a "regular old dude."
And besides, he was green.
That's because...You know...He's got an alcohol addiction.
Nobody'd drink sake if alcohol did that to them!!
You bastards broke my glasses, dammit!
Call your parents! I'm making them pay for this!
It's alive!
Come back here, you guys!
You're not getting away! Tell me your names and addresses!
Look, if you had apologized at the start, I wouldn't be so angry.
If you do something wrong, the right thing to do is to apologize.
Am I wrong? Why did you run?
Well, because you're a kappa.
A kappa? What's that? Don't try to trick me by talking nonsense!
You're the one who's making the least sense!
What is it about me that doesn't make sense? Tell me, young girl!
And don't call me "you." Call me Ebina-san.
We're sorry, Ebina-san.
I'll break my glasses, too, so please forgive us.
Good. That was a fine apology, son.
Have a biscuit as a reward.
No thanks, you beast!
Well, it's a good thing it was only my glasses that broke.
If it had been my dish that broke, this old man would have lost it.
I'd have beaten you all to a pulp.
Understand this: nobody lays a finger on this dish.
The dish broke!
Oh man! The dish broke!
I don't know what's so awful about it, though.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I was practicing my golf swing when it just slipped out of my hands!
This is why I told you to leave this place.
This isn't your home. This is my property.
Because I bought this entire area...
Shut up!
I've been living here since back when you were still in your father's jewels!
Why should I have to leave?!
Stop staring at me! It's embarrassing!
No cameras please. Really.
He's gotten a bit shy after his dish cracked.
What's with that dish, anyway?
I plan to build a huge golf course on this land.
And this pond is in the way!
I'll find you another pond where you can live, so would you please just leave?
That's not the issue!
This pond doesn't belong only to me.
It's also her...
I don't really understand you, pal.
But if you're going to cause me any more trouble, you'd better be prepared for what's coming.
You never know when the next golf ball is gonna come flying at you.
There, it's fixed, old man.
Huh?! Did you hear a cracking noise?
It's just your imagination.
Old man, if you're going to move, we'll help.
It's none of your business, fool!
Look over there.
See that odd-looking island?
That's the spaceship I rode here on a long time ago.
Ebina-san, you're an Amanto?
Our species can't live without clean water.
Long ago, our planet lost all its water in a catastrophic natural disaster.
We set out to find a new home.
I found my way to this water planet, Earth.
I was shocked to find such a lovely planet.
At the time, there were hardly any Amanto,
so I felt as though I had this jewel all to myself.
But earthlings only saw me as a monster.
I was persecuted and forced to return to this pond to live in solitude.
But you know, you only feel alive when you're connected to other people.
I found a safe place to live...But it was like being dead.
Until I met her, that is...
She appeared one day along the pond bank.
She didn't do anything; she just stared out at the water.
At first, I hid from her, but after a while it just seemed silly.
You there, why do you always just sit there?
The girl looked at me, and was a bit surprised, but...
I'm lonely and bored in my bedroom, so I thought, "why not be alone out here?"
But there are two of us now.
The girl had a sickness in her lungs.
A contagious disease.
She snuck out of the room where she was kept isolated because no one wanted to be near her.
She didn't care who I was; she just wanted someone to talk to.
And so did I.
Ever since then, the only time I really felt alive was when I was talking with her.
We talked about silly things, but it was fun.
You're lucky, mister.
How so?
You can swim free in such lovely water.
I've been frail since childhood, so I've never been able to swim.
Just once, I wish I could swim freely...
In that clear world...
Strengthen your body.
That's impossible. I've been like this all my life.
Silly girl! Life is long.
I'll protect this place until you're strong and healthy.
I'll keep it just as beautiful as it is now.
So, hurry up and get well.
All right. It's a promise, mister.
You bet.
A promise? But that was decades ago.
Perhaps. But...
The ship he came on looks like it's been there a long time.
One thing's for sure, that girl is long...
This borders on the insane. I can't go along with this.
Okay! Everything ready? Get to it.
Right.
I've just about had it with that rotten kappa.
I'm going to bury the entire lake in dirt.
But are you sure it's okay? What about the kappa's curse?
You idiot!
There's no kappa! That's just an Amanto.
Man, why do we have to do this in the dead of night?
What's going on? It stopped...
I'm Saburo, the kappa. Got a cucumber, mister?
What's going on with Nojima?
Hey, what's going on?
Did the bulldozer snag your jewels or something?!
It is I, Kappa Jiro!
What's with all that screaming?
Did your jewels get caught in the bulldozer or something?
Onishi! Take a look at...
Onishi...?
Wh-Who're you?
I have come from Lake Toya in Ezo.
I am the eldest of the three kappa brothers, Kappa Taro.
Leave this property right now, or the kappa's curse will...
No...not that!
Kappa, what do you want? Cucumbers, right?
Tell me what you want! I don't have much hair, but I have plenty of money!
What we like? Let's see...
Sweets, and guys who take things to extremes, I guess.
What? You guys are back?
I heard...
Seems this land was put up for sale.
After this, I think you'll be okay for a while.
Oh, looks like some real kappa appeared.
Now that's scary.
Could it be? You...
Oh!
So there are beautiful fish like that that living in this pond?
Ha-ha. They sure seem to be having a ball!
462.
What's that?
The number of people who collapsed this summer from heatstroke.
Are you serious?
Gin-san, let's buy an air conditioner after all.
This year's intense heat is too much to get by with just a senpuki.
[Senpuki = a Japanese electric fan. ]
Don't be ridiculous. Where are we going to find that kind of money?
If you have the time to condition our air, learn how to condition your mind.
Suppress your mind to a state of nothingness and even the south pole can be as cool as the north pole.
Gin-san, just so you know,
they call it the "south" pole, but that doesn't mean it's always summer there.
Huh? I know that.
There's no way the south pole is an endless summer paradise.
What I'm trying to say is that even if you suppress your mind to a state of nothingness...
Huh? That doesn't change anything, does it?
How embarrassing!
You contradicted your own argument just to cover up your error!
You're awful! So much for our argument!
In the first place, try going out on a day like this.
You'll collapse before you can buy an air conditioner.
On a day like this, the best thing to do is lay around the house doing nothing.
Our only hope is the senpuki...
Let's all use it with care.
["If You Go to Sleep with the Fan On You'll Get a Stomachache, So Be Careful"]
I can't stand it! What's hot is hot even if I suppress my mind to a state of nothingness.
Why do I have to go and buy a senpuki on a hot day like this?
What a pain in the ass.
This sucks. Maybe I'll switch and buy an air conditioner instead.
What do you say, old man? Should I upgrade to an air conditioner?
Huh? Well, I don't see why not.
That won't do!
Where am I going to find the money to buy an air conditioner?!
Mind your own business!
Why do I have to get totally sweaty to go and buy a machine that makes me cooler?
It's like digging for buried gold with buried gold.
Like drinking before drinking.
When the next senpuki arrives, I'm going to ignore it.
For three days and three nights, I'm going to let it blow against the wall.
This really ticks me off. Should I really buy an air conditioner?
But I don't have any money.
[Tsukamoto Electric]
Huh? A senpuki?
I'm sorry, we don't have anything like that.
These days, people use air conditioners, you know?
How about it, mister?
Why not use this opportunity to upgrade to an air conditioner?
I'll make it cheap.
You mean that? Okay, then. Uh...
[1000 yen or roughly $10 USD]
Can you sell me one for this much?
Come one, come all! It's our big summer sale!
Huh? Mister?
That's strange. He won't make eye contact with me anymore.
Mister!
[Nawa Electric]
A senpuki? Nope, nope. Maybe you should try an antique shop?
What? You're using a senpuki in this day and age?!
Isn't that dangerous? What are you some kind of throwback?
A senpuki?
Ow-ow-ow-ow! What're you doing?! I haven't said anything yet!
Shut up! You probably don't have one anyway. I know that.
I did some research...at the back alley shops.
Grrr, this is really pissing me off!
Even that beautiful blue sky ticks me off! And it's so blue!
Why am I soaking with sweat and passed around from store to store just to buy a measly senpuki?!
Hey, mister, can I go home now? Can I go home already?
Huh? I guess it's okay to go home.
I can't do that! I feel like I've been through a sauna!
You don't know a thing! Don't talk like you do!
Damn. This is wrong, so wrong.
I'm here to buy a senpuki. I came to cool off!
But I'm just getting hotter and hotter!
It ticks me off!
I really should've gotten an air conditioner! But I don't' have the money.
[Recycled Goods Shop: Earth Defense Army Base]
My, it's unusual to have a samurai customer. Welcome.
A senpuki...You have a senpuki, don't you? Get me one!
A senpuki...How nostalgic.
Where did you hear about it?
Never mind, hurry and get one for me!
Now hold on. You're the first customer who's come this far.
At least tell me your name.
What? Is that for a receipt? Just write "customer."
Customer? That's a fine name.
I'll be seeing you, then, Customer!
Whoa!
Wh-Wha-What'd you do that for, you freak!
I want to speak with your manager. Call the manager!
Let go of me! I'll never let an evil syndicate like yours have a senpuki!
What nonsense are you talking about?
Calm down. Maybe you're mistaking me for a thief?
I just came to buy a senpuki.
Hey! What's the matter...?!
Blood?!
Manager! Call the manager!
Found it at last.
The sewer rat's nest.
We didn't think anyone other than that woman survived.
But your luck just ran out today, Earth Defense Army.
What? Are you talking to me? Earth Defen...Say what?
Don't play dumb, damn you! You're a remnant of the Earth Defense Army!
Earth Defense...?
I did once build a bookshelf from milk cartons to be nice to the Earth, but...
Don't give me that! Hand over that senpuki right now!
I get it, you're here to buy a senpuki, too?
Is there a retro boom going on or something?
I didn't know they were such a fad. No wonder I can't buy one.
I'm not letting...
anyone have the senpuki...
I'll never let you have it!
Th-This is...a grena...
Why...does this have to happen to me?
All I did was come to buy a senpuki.
I don't know who you are, but you don't seem to be a bad person.
I told you, I just came to buy a senpuki.
I'd rather give it to you than hand it over to those guys.
Will you take care of this for me?
Hey, are you listening? I said I only came to buy a senpuki.
Recycled Goods Shop: Earth Defense Army Base
Street
Liquor Store
Here
The senpuki is sealed at that address.
I want you to go there and destroy the senpuki.
You're telling someone who came to buy a senpuki, to destroy it?!
It's an evil machine that destroys human souls.
It's not something people should be allowed to have.
What do you mean?
Are you talking about how your hand gets caught if you stick it in?
That does hurt. Everyone does that at least once.
My father was one of the top mechanical engineers in Edo.
People sought his skills and made my father build that thing.
But it was the last machine my father ever built.
I managed to retrieve the senpuki from those men, but I was unable to destroy it this whole time.
All because I was weak.
If that falls into their hands, it's all over. So please, take that senpuki and...
Hurry and go now!
But...
Save Edo...and the Earth!
I keep telling you, I only came here to buy a senpuki!
Something's wrong. Very wrong!
I came to buy a senpuki! So why is this happening to me?!
Stop!
Hey, old man! Why is this happening to me?!
What's going on? Tell me!
Huh? I don't know.
I don't know, either! Moron!
Go to hell!
I've come too far to turn back now!!
The senpuki...
is mine!
Wh-What?! Who is that guy?!
Was there such a monster in the Earth Defense Army?!
After him! Don't let him get away!
We must get the senpuki at any cost!
What is this place? There's nothing but junk.
The senpuki... Where's the senpuki?!
What? This huge storefront cat give me the creeps.
Upsa. And... down...
Are these...
gold coins?
Surprised, are you?
This was built by the brilliant mechanical engineering prodigy, Juttoku.
It's the robotic gold-coin counterfeiting machine no. 3.
In other words, this is a machine that gives a reward to all of you
who worked to make the syndicate rich by minting counterfeit coins just as it planned.
We call it senpuki, for short!
Thank you for showing us the way here.
Now hand over the senpuki! You'll do it if you value your comrade's life!
Never mind me! Quickly destroy it!
Where's the part that spins?
What?
I mean, not like this, but the part that whirs around...
I'm asking you where that is!
What have you done?!
The senpuki... Do you have any idea what that's worth...?
Giving it such a confusing name! I'll phone the JARO on you bastards.
[JARO = Japan Advertisement Review Organization]
I'm soaking with sweat... I've had to work so hard...and even trashed my mo-ped.
Curse you... Damned Earth Defense Army! You won't get away with this!
Now that it's come to this, I'll use my greatest secret weapon to put an end to you.
This thing...
I knew I should've bought an air conditioner.
Air conditioners are the way of the future.
Oh yeah, I don't have any money.
Die!
What?!
You...bastard!
Wait!
Thank you.
You are a hero who saved Edo.
I don't have much, but, but I do have an air conditioner at home.
I don't want an air conditioner.
Like I said from the beginning, I...
Well, you know.
It took blood and guts to get this senpuki, you see.
Look at this brilliant luster.
Doesn't that look a little filthy?
That's because your eyes are a little filthy, Shinpachi-kun.
Now this time, use it with care so you don't break it.
No, you were the one who broke it.
What? What?
What? That's odd. It won't turn on.
You! I'll bet you picked that up from the dump!
You made up that story.
There's no Earth Defense Army. Your story was too long!
Liar! You big, fat liar!
What did you use the money you brought with you for? Pachinko?!
Ow-ow.
Just a minute! It really is the truth!
I destroyed an evil organization!
I really did save the world!
[To Customer, from Earth Defense Army]
[The next episode: "Marriage Is Prolonging an Illusion for Your Whole Life"]
[Female ninja, Assassin Sachan, makes her appearance! Her charm points are her glasses and natto.]
[Does Gin-chan finally decide to get married? He'd better pay his respects to his future father-in-law.]
Ibaraki! Stop going to the Cabaret club so often!